We have a cultural obsession with the bliss of bonding that I think can be very unhelpful. We set new parents up to expect that their first months with their newborn baby will be euphoric. But not only that, we prime them to believe that the moments of rapture are the vital, essential moments in […]
The relationship between parent and child is unique for many reasons and one of those reasons is that the relationship fundamentally involves a power imbalance. The power dynamic between parent and child is, of course, natural and necessary. Yet, it is still incredible to ponder the sheer degree of power that parents have over their […]
It is easy, as a parent, to become dazzled and then disappointed by grand plans, to feel guilty about our supposed lack of achievements or depressed about long days in which nothing much seemed to happen. We live in a culture that celebrates the big, the grand, the fancy, the over the top, the larger […]
Many of the biggest dilemmas parents face are about discipline; how to gradually and effectively shape our children’s behaviour both to make everyone’s life easier in the short-term and to ensure, in the long-term, that as an adult they are equipped with the kinds of skills and behaviours that will bring them success, health and […]
Therapists (psychologists, counsellors, social workers) talk about falling into the trap of seeing a client as a problem to be solved. It is really very easy to fall into this trap and many therapists fall into it for all the right reasons and with all the best intentions. But it definitely is a trap. When […]
Many people today are yearning for a greater sense of purpose in their lives and for a ‘spiritual’ path— a way to day by day become wiser, kinder, more patient and more compassionate. For some, this thirst is for a wholly secular spiritual path— a foundation of meaning divorced from religion. For others, this thirst […]
Feeding a toddler can be anxiety-provoking, frustrating, stressful and messy! Many a well-meaning parent has become trapped in feelings of guilt or anxiety about what or how much their child eats. Fortunately, feeding our fussy toddlers doesn’t have to be so difficult. Here’s how to feed a healthy toddler in five easy steps: Accept that […]
Here’s a little game that I like to play with myself. During those tough parenting moments — the 2am strolls up and down our hallway, the entirely inconvenient and loud tantrums, the discovery of a glorious mess – I reach deep into my own heart and I find the love I feel for my daughter. Now […]
I recently gave an ignite presentation on self-soothing, ‘Self-soothing during infancy and toddlerhood: Our dangerous misconceptions’, at the Association for Contextual Behavioural Science’s international conference in Sydney. An ignite presentation is quite a unique style of presentation! You get 5 minutes and 20 slides and the slides auto-advance. I’ve recorded my ignite presentation and uploaded […]
Toddlers are busy learning all about their world, including learning about their internal, emotional world. Emotional development is just as important as cognitive, motor or language development. Children who have a better understanding of emotion are better able to succeed in the classroom and in the playground. As parents, we can support our children’s emotional […]